Comments on: The Science Behind Why Socializing Drains Introverts

By: Dukat

Dukat — Wed, 20 Dec 2017 11:32:00 +0000

In reply to njguy54.

The observations you have expressed here is not so clearly defined as introvert / extrovert. For example I am INFJ according to 3-4 tests I’ve taken. I grew up thinking exactly what you have described because I have always been surrounded by extroverts. My parents, brother and sister are all extroverts and the friends I was closest to at school were extroverts and so my entire train of thought up until my 30’s has been that I should hide my wishes of solitude.

In recent years as I have started to discover an small understanding of what an introvert actually is, i find one of the more difficult things in my life is trying to find a balance for my ENFJ wife. I often feel like I am “bring her down” as her life has adapted to be more closely to my own desires of wanting to have more solitude and less socialising (particularly in groups).

anyways the point I mean to make is that society expectations (evidently driven predominately by extroverts) looks at stereotypical introverts who seek solitude and alone time as being “losers with no friends”. It’s only recently thanks to global communication that society is starting to realise just how many people are actually introverts and how common it is for people to prefer solitude.

By: Rebecca McNees

Rebecca McNees — Tue, 12 Sep 2017 11:16:00 +0000

Did you consult with an MBTI practitioner when doing this research?? Introversion is in NO WAY about the rewards one seeks and why social interaction is tiresome/draining. I/E is only one of four dichotomies that make up the 16 personality types and there are other factors at play than just I/E. This is simply about how one processes data from the external environment and how one draws energy. Individuals with an introversion preference do extroverted things all the time and you would never know it since it is not a personality trait, but rather a preference. If you did deeper into these preferences, you will see that in Step II MBTI and even III, there are varying degrees of preference and these interact together to influence behaviors, and can even be influences by certain societal and environmental factors.

By: njguy54

njguy54 — Thu, 03 Aug 2017 16:12:00 +0000

There’s a bit of a flip side to this as well. Introverts, generally speaking, are comfortable with solitude, with doing things alone, whereas the thought wouldn’t even occur to an extrovert to go out to eat, say, by themselves. As the article mentions, extroverts get a more powerful reward from socializing, but I have a theory — based on years of observing my extroverted friends — that they also feel the stigma of being perceived as alone more sharply than do introverts. Extroverts often think that if they are seen alone, people will think “that person has no friends, he/she must be a real loser.” Some people might think that, but on the whole that’s not true. Plus, just as introverts get drained in social situations, extroverts find solitude exhausting and stressful. Introverts, on the other hand, often prefer being alone enough that any stigma doesn’t bother them, and mature introverts (those who understand their introverted nature) have, as the kids say, no f***s to give.