How Introverts Can Simplify Life and Find More Peace
As an introvert, when life feels chaotic, it’s easy to get overwhelmed. That’s why finding ways to simplify things matters.
I used to see life as a series of repairs and maintenance. If I was fixing something in my house, I made sure not to ignore other important aspects of my life, like my relationships. If I kept all the areas of my life straight, then I could maintain balance, I’d think.
Of course, that balance only lasted a short time. Life is complicated and messy, and things happen simultaneously, regardless of how much we want everything to go to plan.
As an introvert, when everything is spinning out of control, I feel overwhelmed. So I knew I had to figure out a way to simplify my life and, as a result, feel calmer.
I had many negative and unhealthy mental habits that made my life more difficult than it had to be. I did a lot of overthinking and needed to eliminate the mental clutter and change my mindset. If something didn’t inspire joy or add to my feelings of well-being, it had to go.
Soon, my life became simpler and easier to handle without all the overwhelm and complications. Here are the ways I simplified my life, and I hope some can work for you, too.
10 Ways for Introverts to Simplify Their Life
1. Don’t complicate things.
I’m not saying you can’t get what you want when you want it. However, if you want a cheese sandwich, don’t order a cheeseburger: Hold the lettuce, tomato, special sauce, and burger. Order the cheese sandwich.
Some people like to make things unnecessarily complicated. But if you’re truthful and direct with what you want at the start, you can avoid creating a lot of stress for yourself (and others).
Being direct also means speaking up for yourself rather than having someone else ask for you. I know, speaking up is not the first thing that comes to an introvert’s mind — it might require stepping out of your comfort zone. But if it benefits you in the long run, you need to be your own advocate. Write down what you’ll say before you say it, rehearse it (to yourself, to a friend), and then ask for what you want (and likely need).
2. Don’t take everything personally.
As an introvert, you probably don’t have the showiest personality, but that doesn’t mean you don’t need attention. Sometimes, you misinterpret what someone says about you or what they do. Often, it has nothing to do with you, and by inserting yourself into it, you’re only creating a lot of otherwise-avoidable drama.
And, you guessed it: Drama and conflict only make life more complicated.
Most of the time, people are more concerned about their actions than worrying about how those actions affect other people. Don’t unnecessarily throw yourself in the mix or assume you know their thoughts or motivations. You can’t see inside their head, and you have no idea what they’re thinking or why. You’ll drive yourself nuts trying to figure out why you’re on their hit list when, in reality, you’re probably not.
3. Stop worrying about what other people think of you.
Not everyone will like you, no matter how much you try to win them over. The best plan is to be the most authentic version of yourself; hopefully, they’ll recognize what an incredible person you are.
If they never like you, that’s okay, too. It’s their loss, whether they know it or not.
Introverts take their time building relationships. Some people may decide it’s too difficult to get to know you and make a snap decision that they don’t like you. Again, that’s their issue — not yours.
You’ll never be the perfect version of anything, and it takes too much energy and mental bandwidth to try to please everyone. Although you may be tempted to people-please, use that energy instead to do what pleases you.
4. Don’t beat yourself up for something you did or said.
Introverts tend to be extremely self-aware, and that’s a good quality to have, but sometimes, that self-awareness turns inward. The next thing you know, you’re going over a past conversation in your mind, noting all the wrong things you said and criticizing yourself for them… minutes, hours, days, or weeks later. (Here’s where overthinking comes into play again!)
Why did you ask about their partner? You knew they were no longer together.
Don’t sweat it. In life, there are no take-backs or do-overs — only lessons learned and things to live with. The last thing you want to do is police yourself and turn your self-awareness into self-consciousness.
Everybody messes up, so the best thing to do is acknowledge it to yourself and move on. As the song says, “Let it go.”
5. Dwelling on the past is unhealthy. Instead, practice acceptance.
Introverts may not jump into relationships quickly, but when we get attached, we’re all in. If we feel as if we’re doing everything and the other person isn’t making much of an effort, or they aren’t giving us what we feel we deserve, it can be hurtful and disappointing.
It helps to know what you will — and won’t — accept. Maybe they’re giving their all, just in a way different from yours. Can you accept what they’re able to give? Or is it best to rethink the relationship?
You don’t want to suffer in silence, but it’s not healthy to blow up over something that isn’t going to change.
6. Don’t compare your life to the lives of others.
No one’s life is amazing every minute of the day. No matter how close you are to someone, you’ll never know all their struggles, issues, or failures. What looks ideal on the outside may be very different once the blinders come off.
If it seems as if everyone is achieving the same goals you’ve set for yourself, instead of comparing yourself to them, look at what they did to achieve them and modify their strategies to suit your skills and talents. Introverts excel at deep work, so now’s the time to dive into it.
Of course, don’t copy them move-for-move — learn from both their triumphs and mistakes.
There’s a reason why comparison is called “the thief of joy,” and it can pull you into a dark mental space.
7. Make peace with “no.”
Your time is valuable, so don’t give it away just because you feel guilty turning someone down. If you’re not comfortable doing it, or simply don’t want to, it’s much better to say “no” than to do it and resent them for your decision.
Saying “yes” to things you don’t want to do can set off a chain reaction involving feeling taken advantage of, resentment, and anger. Pretending you’re fine with something you felt pressured into will only complicate your life — both now and later.
You may feel as if once you’ve said “yes,” you’re expected to say yes to everything. You might start ignoring their calls or avoiding places where you could run into them.
So saying “no” is the simple and effective answer.
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8. Define your priorities.
Once you know what’s important to you, you’ll be able to make a plan (even if it’s just a mental outline) of what you want to achieve and how.
What will help you keep evolving mentally, emotionally, and spiritually? What truly matters to you? What is most important?
Writing down and ranking your priorities can serve as a guide to help you make better decisions. We introverts love planning, so consider this to be a life plan, of sorts.
9. Try not to catastrophize.
When something goes wrong, it’s not the end of everything. Instead of getting yourself all worked up (which will only cause undue stress), try journaling to explore why it’s bothering you so much. What can you learn from it? How can you improve to prevent it from happening again? What can you do now to improve the situation?
Don’t let yourself stagnate — use this as a chance to grow and become stronger. So take this opportunity to learn from your mistakes and become a stronger version of yourself. As an introvert, you have an inner desire to learn everything you can, and that includes new things about yourself.
10. Be around people who lift you up.
You can’t wait around for someone to magically become the person you want them to be. Take note of the red flags: If they’re toxic or a danger to you, you need to decide if they’re worth having in your life.
It’s easy to advise you to cut all the toxic people out of your life, and while that would simplify things, it may not always be possible. What is in your control, however, is how you let these people affect you.
Surrounding yourself with positive influences who make you feel good about yourself makes life easier. You’ll see. Soon, the “good” ones will outweigh the “bad.” The more you’re around people who lift you up, the happier you’ll be — and life will feel simpler.
Introverts, how do you simplify your life? I’d love to hear in the comments below! 
